In my ongoing (and somewhat foiled, at this point) attempts at tracing my genealogy, I’ve gone back through my dad’s old family photos (mostly from 1930-1960), which turned up a few years ago. At the time, they were interesting, but they were a bit like looking at someone else’s pictures. I recognized my grandparents and my dad, but I not only didn’t recognize most of the subjects — I also felt no connection to them.
Now, at least, I can put faces to the names on the old Census forms. But even my dad can’t identify some of the people. And so, they’ll remain strangers.
(First-time visitors to the apartment often ask if all the old group portraits hanging on the walls are of family. They’re not. They’ve been picked up at tag sales, flea markets, and junk shops. It’s always struck me as odd that folks would get rid of their family photos, but perhaps it’s because the faces were as unfamiliar to them as my family’s photos are to me. But some people, like me, enjoy looking at photos of strangers.)
About this photo (click to enlarge it [whoops, originally uploaded a flipped version]): This here is my great-grandmother’s second husband (of three, total) and their dog. It was taken on the back porch of the house my family lived in in Windsor Terrace. Even though it has little resonance for me on a personal level (never met that guy, never met that dog, and never been to that house), I think it’s the most unintentionally brilliant photo in any of the family albums. Why is the dog sitting on the chair? Why is he posing for a photo?
And why is Tom Waits standing in the doorway?
Last night N and I went to see the awesome Tiger! Shit! Tiger! Tiger! A good time was had by all, and we went home, and by then it was 1 am, which is way past my bedtime, and I made the foolish move of checking my email and there were web update requests that I just…couldn’t…leave…for…the…morning. Sigh.
On one hand, it’s good when your bosses see that you’re willing to do Whatever It Takes to get the job done. But then they start expecting things of you, things like “work ethic” and “ambition.”
If you missed T!S!T!T! last night, you can catch them tomorrow night at an unofficial CMJ show at Bushwick Music Studios featuring them, The Tryptics, Renminbi, Pet Ghost Project, Spiral Beach, and Cinema Cinema. Why the hell not?
Also at the show last night were Dallas band Binary Sunrise. We enjoyed their set and I picked up the CD. Haven’t listened to it yet, but it’s got a naked woman on the cover (sadly, not greased and on all fours, with a dog collar around her neck) so it’s probably awesome.
I’m just tryin’ to boost my “booty shakin’” page rank on Google. Because the beat don’t stop till a) the break of dawn and/or b) I am the number one Google hit for “booty shakin’.”
Before I brought this site to life, heh, I (thought I) made a conscious choice to be less vituperative and condescending and judgmental, mostly because I’ve been working on the concepts of “right thought” and “right speech.”* And also because slinging insults, even well-deserved ones, is much easier for me when I can do it anonymously. There’s only so many times you can say “you’re an asshole” or “your [life's work] is shit” before someone comes and punches you in the face or writes a scathing (though funny) essay about you and then reads it aloud in three different places** (including McNally Jackson this Wednesday) (did you see what I did there?) or singles you out in his Amazon review in a tone that indicates several decades’ worth of romantic rejections due to micropenis.
Anyhow, that’s my qualifying sentiment for what I’m about to write, and I do want to add that the only friend I have who’s even close to being Buddhist told me it was okay.
I spent all day Saturday in the library, doing school work, and I discovered something really funny. I always thought that my tendency to procrastinate was directly fueled by my Internet addiction, but it turns out that even when I don’t have wireless connectivity, I can still manage to procrastinate–by staring off into space for 45 minutes at a stretch.
Saturday night, I met up with N and friends at the French place down in Brooklyn where they all gather to play petanque and drink pastis. I know it sounds super-bourgeois, and it probably would be, were it not for the fact that half of them are ex-DC hardcore guys and the other half are Frank Booth-style malcontents.
So after several hours of this, we got on the G to head home. It was packed! (This never happens.) I had to shoulder my way through the doorway, even (well, mostly because I’m an asshole). N and I were in the middle of the car, surrounded by hipsters–and guess what, your mid-30s are officially the end of hipsterdom, real or imagined, which is something I learned between 3 years ago when I last blogged and now–and on one side of us we had a passel of disaffected 20-somethings wearing cut-offs and docksiders and Really Stupid Eyewear and on the other side we had a shirtless dude who was listening to his iPod and Rocking the Fuck Out.
Despite the stark contrast, I understood that all of these people were coming from the same annoying event.
N and I rolled our eyes. Actually, we rolled our eyes so many goddamned times we started tripping like Brion Gysin and his Dreammachine.*** Hipster Gang eyed Rocking Guy with derision. Finally, their ringleader (who I swear was sporting a well-manicured mustache and an acid-washed denim backpack but I can’t be sure I’m not remembering some pastiche, because as everyone knows eyewitness accounts are rarely accurate) went over to him and asked what he was listening to, then returned to tell his friends and they all chuckled. Rock Guy continued to Rock Out. Air guitar, air drums, air theremin.
N had a better view of him, and I had a better view of the Elders of Grizzly Bear. “That guy’s a tool,” he said. “He’s just looking for attention.”
I will admit that in most cases, I’d probably agree with him. Because despite being at most 25 and reasonably in touch with what the kids are wearing, he was shirtless and playing air guitar and thus thisclose to being that guy who walks around the park with a boa constrictor on his shoulders.
But I looked at the people standing behind N, the ones mocking Rock Guy like he was Christ Carrying the Cross and one of them was a girl wearing Sally Jesse Raphael eye glasses and eating a BAG OF SNOW PEAS and another one was a guy with the fucking National Bohemian logo tattooed on his forearm and I made the pronouncement that I’d much rather be Rock Guy than any of those people. Then N and I debated just who was the single biggest asshole on the train. And then we pulled into the Metropolitan station and everyone but us got off before I could pick a fight with any of them.
The moral of this story is that declaring Rock Guy the lesser asshole is the closest I’ve gotten to Right Thought and Right Speech.
The end.
(By the way, you will be unsurprised to hear that everyone was coming from the Animal Collective show in Prospect Park.)
*Not because I’m a Buddhist or anything; it just seems like a nice thing to do and until I can will people to die using only my intense hatred of mankind, I’m beginning to suspect that having a constant Frank Booth-style narrative running through my mind at all times isn’t very healthy.
**And hey, I have an intriguing follow-up to this part.
***Google it, philistines.
[I started writing this two days ago. The paucity of material around here is due partly to work constraints as well as the 11th hour freaking out about my thesis. Things might be quiet around here until after the 24th.]
Last night I went to trivia night in Greenpoint (which I admit guiltily, given that [...]
Where did she go?
I am lazy. If you're bored, go visit my tumblr, updated daily with other people's witticisms and erudition.Also by me
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